Cave Demons and Vampires in Norrisville
by Jet556
Summary: An examination at the epic of cave demons that beleaguered Norrisville in the 18th century and an encounter with a vampire who has an actual ache for ichor.
1. The Attack

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 **The Attack**

Ken Finlayson sat at home. Speaking to his dad on the phone, Ken looked at some old newspapers from the 19th century while the television played.

"Alright, dad, so these things are pretty much the same as the giant bat-like creatures that attacked you and your friends during the war. What did you call them again?"

"Cave demons, Ken." Replied Mr. Finlayson. "They were winged humanoids, about five feet tall with eerie feminine features."

"Did they look like mom at all?"

"How should I know? I went blind before I met your mother!"

Ken gave a chuckle. "Right. Now carrying on… Were you with Sanderson in the Cameroon when he and his hunting party were attacked by giant bat-like creatures?"

"Sanderson was in the Cameroon in 1932!" Mr. Finlayson had been born in 1942, making Ken and his older brother Pierre the products of a May-December romance. "And why should that be any different from what happened to me and my war buddies? Sightings of arcane, being-sized bats have been reported in all corners of the earth."

"And all of them are described as having black fur and monkey-like faces?"

"Oh, yes… They are called many things. The people in Brazil call them 'Bat People.' The Mayans worshipped Camazotz and if what you said was true about the Death Raptor having been a Phoenician god then no doubt Camazotz must be the father of this race of monsters!"

"The Mayan god?" asked Ken.

"The same!" answered Mr. Finlayson. "I remember being in Java and hearing the cries of a bat creatures the Javanese called the 'Athol.' To my thinking it might be an alpha! And then there are the ones in Vietnam… They call them 'Night Flyers' but 'Cave Demons' is a thousand times more accurate a term since it was from caves they came and they very much looked like demons."

"Any other sightings of cave demons during your days of the war?"

"Ken, throughout history soldiers have reported anomalous meetings with alien pinioned animals."

"You think these things are extraterrestrial?"

"Not the kind of alien I meant." Mr. Finlayson sighed. "They might be like the Harpies, the winged female death spirits of Greek mythology."

"Wait a minute!" exclaimed Ken. "If Camazotz is the father of this race then who is the mother? Please don't tell me you believe it to be the Vibria!"

"It is possible. The Vibria could have given birth to these monstrosities before Count Jofre el Pilos destroyed it. Why do you ask?"

"Because these things were in Norrisville in the nineteenth century!" Ken's attention was then turned to the television. Heidi was on it there was a microphone in her hand.

"The Administration is now digging into what appears to be an attack at a local gas station. Security footage shows what appear to be a customer being attacked by some sort of… We don't know what. This is rather scary." As soon as Heidi stopped talking and the footage was shown, Ken dashed out of the house. He then came back in and told his dad he'd talk to him later, hung up the phone and grabbed his tomahawk.

()

"Stop the report!" yelled Ken as he arrived on the scene. All present immediately stopped and stared at him. Heidi was the first, Debbie Kang the second and everyone else soon followed. Walking in front of the camera, Ken spoke. "People of Norrisville, do not be alarmed! The attacker is nothing more but a vampire." The statement only caused an outrage of criticism. In what way was that nothing to be worried about?

"Another piece of ingenious advice from the Loon of Leeville!" commented Debbie. She was just so harsh a critic that Ken had to banish the thought of throwing his tomahawk at her.

Loon? He was no loon.

Taking a deep breath, Ken turned and faced Debbie. "You have the gall to call me a loon? You've got some immortal hero in a place where people turn into monsters at random. Is a vampire really so hard for you to believe in?" Ken made a good point but a vampire sounded so generic in Norrisville that it just as well seemed impossible. "Alright, just show the footage again… on something else… I will need to actually prove that this thing is a vampire." Good thinking on his part. When most of a populace believed one to be insane one had to prove he was not. He wasn't, although some did believe him to be, he was really one hundred percent sane. "Actually, hold on the footage. It is time for a little history lesson."


	2. The Subject of Cave Demons

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 **The Subject of Cave Demons**

Standing before a white board with a picture of a bat-like winged humanoid on it, Ken held a pointed and pointed at the picture.

"This was an exceeding, exceeding alarming creature. It was slaying a lot of the citizenry." He said. Ken then looked at the picture. "It was in 1820, predating Cameron, I mean, Sanderson's encounter with them in the Cameroon by one hundred and twelve years. Please, no Nickelodeon references." He took a breath before continuing. "This thing killed someone hundred and twenty-nine people before the Ninja eventually took care of it. Now, I must go into some detail on these things because yes, there is more than one of them as my mentioning of Cameroon in the Sanderson, I mean Sanderson in the Cameroon pretty much stated." Ken took another breath. "Alright so in Da Nang, Vietnam in 1969 my dad and two of his—"

"Wait a minute!" interrupted Debbie. Her interruption caused Ken's eyes to glaze over. "Your dad?"

"Yes, my dad. He was born in 1942 and during a period where he was living here in America, the Johnson administration forced any able bodied young man they could get their hands on into the army to ship them off to Vietnam. Lyndon is no relation to our Bash Johnson I'm sure… Nixon didn't even care, just kept any soul forced into that war to stay and die in Vietnam." Ken cleared his throat. "Uh, yes, well. Carrying on. "My dad and two of his buddies Al Pritchett and Steve D'Arcy, who were all US marines, claimed they were attacked by giant bat-like creatures. Winged humanoids, five feet tall, with eerie feminine features… I often wonder if they look like my mom. I asked my dad but as he told me he went blind in 1982." Ken once more cleared his throat. "Uh, sorry about that. Got a little bit sidetracked. The monsters repeated swooped down on them, terrorizing them for hours before vanishing into the night. Now, before continuing do any of you have any questions?" Debbie raised a hand. "Yes?"

"Is there a history of madness in your family?"

"Only on my mom's side and it has always been the women." Answered Ken. "Must have been what caused her to eat my sister." Grabbing a glass of water, Ken took a sip and swallowed. "Sorry about that. If I cause any nightmares from that revelation, send me the therapist bill. Now, carrying on… Ivan Sanderson encountered such creatures when in 1932 he was in the Cameroon. He described them as being and I quote 'black as coal with membranous wings and long sharp teeth.' The natives call them the Olitiau, Sanderson deemed them and again I quote 'the granddaddy of all bats.' Now, you must be thinking but Sanderson was in Cameroon and my dad was in Vietnam and that event in 1820 was here in America. That is impossible isn't it? Well, no! Hardly! Sightings of mysterious, human-sized bats have been reported all over the world. The fearsome creatures are often described as having black fur, matching Sanderson's description, and monkey-like faces… Feminine features and monkey-like faces, sounds horrible. The Brazilians call them 'Bat People', the Mayans worshipped Camazotz whom I believe to be the King Cave Demon, the Javanese rainforests echo with the cries of the Athol and in Vietnam where my dad and his friends met them they are called 'Night Flyers.'" Ken took a breath before continuing. He was starting to wish he had made a presentation instead of just running out of the house. "Now, throughout warfare's bloody history soldiers have reported strange encounters with unearthly winged creatures. Harpies are the—"

"Skip this bit, Ken." Interrupted Heidi. "We know what harpies are."

"Do you know what the Vibria is?" asked Ken. When nobody answered he continued. "The Vibria is a flying female dragon from Catalan legend in the middle ages. Sirens are—"

"We know what sirens are too!" exclaimed Debbie. "And we get your point, these things aren't that unknown to history!" It was at this point that her eyes lit up. "Do you think the one from 1820 could have been one of Camazotz brood come north?"

"Good an answer as any!" replied Ken.

"Wait a minute!" exclaimed Debbie. "In just what way are these things… Oh, right. Carry on with the look at vampires."


	3. The Subject of Vampires

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 **The Subject of Vampires**

"Alright, folks, we are moving on to vampires." Said Ken. "In a mass grave north of Venice—"

"Venice, Italy?" interrupted Debbie.

"No Venice, Alberta. Yes Venice, Italy!" Ken sighed. "Look, please just don't interrupt. In a mass grave north of Venice in the March of 2009, I encountered a vampire. Yes, I. Just don't call me Kenny the Vampire Slayer. I did kill it, not with a stake though. I thrust brick into its mouth. Lying. My older brother Pierre did. He is attending university in Outer Mongolia right now."

"What did it look like? Was it like Vlad the Impaler or something from…" Heidi couldn't even finish the sentence.

"No! No! It was nothing like what Meyer would create!" Ken swallowed. "It looked like a cross between a vampire bat and a gorilla. And no, it did not have wings. Pretty much matches what we saw on the security video. It can't talk, can't shape-shift, no powers… It is like a living heat-seeking missile. My dad encountered one in Montreal, Canada in 1972. He got it with a stake. Pierre and I were in Ontario in 2006 when we first encountered a vampire. Took its head off with a machete. My great-great-grandpa encountered one and staked it while it slept. They really much more common than cave demons and sunlight does nothing to them. That is an invention of the movies." Ken took a breath. "That is all I've got about vampires."

"What was that about them being more common than cave demons?" asked Heidi.

"Vampires are less dangerous than cave demons and cave demons are less dangerous than strigoi therefore the more dangerous something is the less common it is."

"What's a strigoi?" asked Debbie.

"Oh, simply one of the three kinds of vampires that is the only one that looks human and that has powers." Ken's took a breath. "From what my dad says cave demons are capable of speech. So at the top we've got something that looks completely human with powers, in the middle we've got some humanoid bat monsters that can speak the tongues of humanity and at the bottom we've got some horrid cross between vampire bat and gorilla than is basically a living heat-seeking missile." That was quite the way to sum it up.

"Well, at least we've got the one at the bottom." Said Heidi. "Should be easy to find just need to look for… There are no mass graves in Norrisville."

"But the one in Ontario was in Casa Loma, which is a castle turned mansion." Stated Ken. "Which means the vampire could be anywhere in Norrisville."


	4. Locating the Vampire

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 **Locating the Vampire**

No castles and no mass graves… Where to look then? Norrisville was a big place and a to find that one thing in that place gave those looking for it the proverbial needle in the haystack. Such was the locating of the vampire.

Ken merely sat away from a camera, thinking to himself. Where could the vampire have been? Where had the vampires he'd encountered been? A mass grave and a castle… But where had it been exactly in the castle? In a cellar, in a part that people rarely ventured to and that had resulted in an awful mess that all kind of vermin could call a nest… Much like the mass grave! A vampire would make a nest the same place vermin would make theirs… That only brought Ken back to square one. Or did it? He didn't really follow the news so he wouldn't know but he had a feeling that someone would know.

Standing up, Ken walked over to Heidi and tapped her on the shoulder. "Excuse me, honey I mean Heidi. Is there any news about a missing exterminator?"

Heidi was still in shock that Ken had used an informal word of endearment. He had really just accidentally called her "honey." Not sweetheart, not darling, not dear, not dearest, not love. He had accidentally called her honey. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Is there any news of a missing exterminator?"

"Not to my knowledge, angel." That was no accident. Heidi had deliberately called Ken "angel." Ken gave a bit of a smile. He had dreamed of being called that and now he had been. "No, wait, I have! At the McFist mansion."

"Okay then, the Ninja can handle the Vampire." Ken started to walk away.

"What? Why?"

"I'm not setting foot in the house of some evil villain!"

"Hannibal McFist is not an evil villain!"

"In what way is a robotic arm with a brain that has eyes in it the look of a good guy!"

"Oh, this just in! Crazy Ken thinks Hannibal McFist is an evil villain!" said Debbie as she approached. "Also, it is kind of hypocritical in your case! Should someone who looks like you think negatively of someone else's appearance?"

Rolling his eyes, Ken walked out the doorway. He would go to the McFist mansion. He would ask about their exterminator trouble. He would get in. He'd get out. That would be that.


	5. McFist's Mansion

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 **McFist's Mansion**

McFist's mansion was not the best mansion Ken had ever seen not that he had seen many mansions or even been in them but he had seen mansions and been in many nonetheless. He'd place it on number five of his top ten mansions. All he needed now was to be in see and be in five other mansions.

"Nice place." Commented Ken. He then looked to McFist standing not far away. "And the door to your cellar would be?" McFist just pointed at a door. "Uh, yeah. I'll go down and take care of the vampire… Wait, how big is the cellar?"

"Big enough." That was all an answer McFist gave. He considered Ken an annoyance as would anyone who had seen Ken's interruptions of Heidi's podcasts which came down to a total of two times. Now he had come to McFist's house. "Just get down there and do what a bunch of robo-apes can't!"

"Get the Ninja?" asked Ken.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"And I'm John DiMaggio." Ken went down into the cellar, tomahawk in hand and saw a number of destroyed robo-apes. Those were robo-apes… Those were not exterminators… Yet the more Ken looked at the robotic husks the more he thought that the vampire was still a threat if it could destroy these machines.

And then he saw some movement. It was quick but still Ken could identify it. It was that vampire. Even in color it looked ugly. He stood at the top of the basement stairs and waited for the beast to see him. Once it did Ken threw the tomahawk and that was the end of that vampire.

Upon getting his tomahawk, Ken looked at the dead vampire. It was ugly to say the least. It was like any other vampire. Not exactly like how some vampires in film and literature looked. He cleaned the tomahawk on the vampire's fur and then left.


	6. Strigoi

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 **Strigoi**

Cave Demons, Vampires… How long until a Strigoi showed up in Norrisville? Looking at the file Ken had on Strigoi he had formed out of word of mouth he could only wonder.

The Strigoi was one of the earliest kinds of vampires, originating in Romania. They only had one thing in mind and that was to sustain themselves! Like a tick they would fill themselves with blood. They were capable of shapeshifting, invisibility, super speed, overpowering strength… They were by nature dangerous. There was some belief that they were connected to infectious diseases but there was little proof of that. In order to kill a Strigoi one would have to exhume the corpse, remove the heart and cut it in two, drive a nail into its forehead, place a clove of garlic under its tongue, then smear its body with the fat of a pig killed on St. Ignatious day, July 31st, and finally turn the body upside down so if the Strigoi were to be brought back to life it would be headed in the wrong direction.

Ken had his knowledge and if one were to ever appear in Norrisville he'd be ready.

Sighing, Ken put the file back in the folder and looked at the picture of his dad standing over a dead cave demon. This was a fine life and Norrisville was a fine place to live. Always there was an adventure in store. Ken was sure that once the dig his dad was on was over, he'd like it here in Norrisville.

And then there was the case about him and Heidi. Ken had known her for how long and he hadn't really talked to her about they felt about each other… if she felt anything for him. He was in love with her but was she in love with him? He had a feeling she was but what if it was just a feeling?

He decided to go and see Heidi. However since convenience is a wonderful thing, Heidi had been going to see Ken too. One would have thought they would have met each other halfway but they had taken different routes causing them to miss each other. Not once but twice. When Heidi realized Ken was not home she took the route Ken had taken to her house and when Heidi and Howard's dad Mort informed Ken that Heidi had gone to see Ken by giving him a surprise visit resulting in Ken returning to his house using the route Heidi had taken. Thus they missed each other a second time. Giving up with the surprise visits, they both just decided to call one another. Ken was about to call when an extremely aggressive goose attacked him for no reason resulting in Heidi being the one who called.

"H-Hello?" answered Ken, sounding rather shaken.

"Ken?" asked Heidi. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I was just assailed by an exceeding antagonistic gander."

"Oh, you met Lucifer huh?"

"Lucifer?" asked Ken.

"We don't talk about him." Heidi took a deep breath before speaking. "Look, I've been wanting to talk to you."

"I have too, Heidi." Ken could be heard swallowing from his end. "I know I'm not some beautiful crystal vase with beautiful fragrant flowers… I-I mean I'm n-not some armor in shining knight, I mean knight in shining armor… No, I'm no Hyperion… Uh, even over the phone I don't know how to put this."

Heidi merely gave a smile. "You're not, you're better than all of those."

Ken placed a hand over his racing heart. "You know how I feel about you."

"I do." Said Heidi. "And it's mutual."

 **The End**


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